roesslyng: (EstFin - You're my best friend)
[personal profile] roesslyng
Title: Always Yes
Characters/Pairing: Estonia/Finland
Rating: 18+
Length: 2440
Summary: They decide to try something new, but it doesn't go the way that they had hoped.
Other: Written for the Hetalia kink meme. (Original post)



Always Yes

The air was still. They walked together. The cold nipped at them and slipped its fingers through the layers of their clothing, touching and pinching.

Finland lifted his head and breathed in deeply. “Storm is coming,” he said quietly.

Estonia did the same. The crisp air smelled of coming snow. “Yes,” he agreed.

“It’ll be a big one.”

“Yes.”

They walked faster. Surely they would beat the blizzard. Even so, there was no need to risk it. Their steps matched pace. Side by side, they moved together on the crunching snow.



When they were finally inside they sealed themselves up. The fireplace was a mess of ash, burnt to nothing and cold. Finland set to with flint while Estonia secured the door against the coming wind. Soon flames licked at the dry logs set in the fireplace and the air began to warm.

Estonia put his ear to the door. He could hear the first gusts pounding at the wood. “Wind,” he said quietly.

“Ah?”

“We just beat it.” Soon it would pick up, rattling, shaking, but shake though it might the building would hold. There was no worry there. Satisfied, Estonia sank down next to Finland in front of the fire. They nestled together like two birds, leaning into each other for warmth. Finland took his hands and blew on them, trying to rub out the chill.

“Your hands are cold,” he said.

“Warm me, then.” Estonia slid off his spectacles and set them aside, then nestled once more into Finland’s open arms. He brushed his lips over Finland’s dry cheeks and rubbed noses with him, smiling. “Your nose is cold.”

“Yours, too.” The light was dim and without his spectacles Estonia could not easily make out Finland’s features, but as he drew him closer, he was sure his eyes were bright. He slid his arms around him and pressed a kiss to his lips, savouring it. Though the mouth he kissed was rough and wind-chapped the response was gentle, loving and endlessly better than what anyone else could give him.

In the fire’s warm orange glow they were flush against each other, breath mixing, the kisses quickly becoming much more. A sigh was met with the brush of a slick tongue and Estonia opened for him, welcoming it, greeting it with one of his own. Soon each brushing, probing gesture left them breathless.

When they finally broke for air Finland teased, “Are you warm enough yet?” He low-lidded eyes were questioning.

A smirk tugged at Estonia’s lips. “No.”

“Good.”

They laughed as Finland nudged him onto his back. When their lips met once more it was a moment before the joyful sound subsided, replaced by content sighs and the occasional muffled gasp. The chill of the outside was forgotten as they consumed each other.

When the kisses lightened, gentled, and broke, Estonia stroked his lover’s hair and nuzzled him, lingering close in order to see him. Finland seemed thoughtful, as though he was considering something, and though Estonia craved more, he knew to wait, so he contented himself with stealing light kisses while rested patiently beneath the other nation.

Eventually Finland murmured by his ear, “I’ve been thinking about something new we could do.” His words were accompanied by a light nip and fluttering breath. “To keep warm, that is. Of course. Are you still cold?”

“If I said I was,” Estonia whispered, “would you tell me your idea?”

“Yes.”

“Then I am.”

Slow, thoughtful kisses trailed downward along his neck. “I’ve been told about something.” A stroke of the tongue. “Something else. Different. More complicated.” Once more there was breath by his ear and a slick tongue brushing, stroking.

A soft gasp escaped him and he clung to Finland, flustered. “Nngh. I think I know what you’re talking about,” he whispered as he fidgeted beneath him.

“Do you?” Drifting hands worked at his clothing to slowly undo the fastenings. “And what do you think?” Finland nuzzled him once more, and Estonia could tell he was watching him, uncertain, nervous, wary of the response.

He mulled over the thought. The things he had heard about had sounded pleasant enough. Very well, then. He nuzzled Finland then pressed a kiss to his lips. A brushing tongue over the mouth hinted, and when Finland slid past his lips the slow, deliberate sucking was a blatant invitation.

They stayed that way for a time and when they parted, Estonia clung to his lover and murmured, “We should try it.”

“We should.”

In that way, it was decided.



The blizzard’s blowing shook the walls but as they slowly helped one another shed their clothing they paid it no heed. Though the storm raged they were snug as foxes in a burrow. There was no doubt the walls would hold. Their concern was more complicated things.

“You know how it’s supposed to work, right?” Finland paused to murmur uncertainly by Estonia’s ear.

“Yes.” He had heard about the mechanics of it. At the time he had thought it was strange. He still thought that. The body did not seem built for that kind of thing. Yet the things he had heard were so pleasant – surely it was like the other things they had done, which he had thought sounded odd, but upon experiencing them was easily convinced otherwise. “Do you know, too?”

“Yes.” The kiss that followed seemed almost shy. “At least, ah, I’ve been told things. It’s probably like those other things, right? Easy after you’ve started.”

Estonia was not entirely convinced. Their other adventures had seemed strange, but were really a mere matter of touching, licking and sucking, and they had quickly become experts. The new thing seemed complicated. Yet, he reasoned, Finland was probably right. “It can’t be that difficult,” he murmured. “If everyone else can do it, we can figure it out.”

They resumed drawing off every stitch, and for a time no further words were said on the matter. The slow gestures were familiar, been done so many times before, yet somehow there was a shyness in the way hands grazed lightly against skin, anticipating the adventure that was to come. When the both of them were bare they trailed lips and fingertips, every touch, stroke and caress given by one to tease the other into arousal. They had long ago discovered what was most effective and as they moved they used every tactic they knew to abuse each others’ sweet spots. A nip at the ear, the slick sweeping of tongue over throat, grazing teeth, whispered words and hot breath, lips ghosting over skin. Their mouths met, pressed, slow but insistent. Estonia parted his lips, took his lover in, stroking and sucking as Finland’s hands grazed over him, gliding lightly over chest, hip, thigh. At the lightest inward touch he opened for him, and when Finland slid his hand between his legs he pressed into it and responded in turn with his own gestures, a trembling hand drifting down. He found him already firm and worked him with careful fingers, stroking in the familiar way, making his lover draw in a quick breath and move in time with his touches.

All too soon the gestures slowed. Their kiss broken, they watched each other, panting. Each knew what would happen but seemed unsure how to proceed. Finally, Estonia murmured, “If you don’t do it soon, we’ll both be finished.”

“Right.” Finland paused to think. “I heard, er. If you do it dry, it hurts too much. I don’t want to hurt you, but. Uh.” He faltered, seeming genuinely uncertain. “Damn, I don’t know....”

“Mm.” Estonia considered their options. If they couldn’t go in dry, they needed something - then he realized, of course. It was simple. He took Finland’s hand and squeezed it, then brought it to his lips, brushing kisses over his knuckles. “I think I know,” he whispered. “Just a bit damp, that will do.” A lick, tongue sweeping. It seemed Finland understood, as he pressed two slim fingers against Estonia’s waiting lips.

He drew them in slowly, his eyes drifting shut as his tongue lapped and stroked, making his lover’s fingers slick. Many a time he had teased him in such a way, and this time Finland’s reaction was little different than before. Estonia resisted the urge to smirk as he heard the quick intake of breath as he brushed his tongue just so; he knew his lover’s eyes were fixed on him, unable to tear away, and he was sure he knew what Finland was imagining, too.

“Damn it, if you don’t stop I’ll...”

Estonia withdrew. “Can’t have that happen.”

“No. We can’t. But are you sure about this?”

“Yes.”

Finland kissed him then, and Estonia responded tenderly, lightly stroking the other’s lips with his tongue. As hands moved downward, he shifted to accommodate him, hoping it would ease the entry, and when the kiss broke once more he nuzzled him gently, whispering words of encouragement. “Don’t worry. Go on.”

He had expected discomfort, but as Finland’s slick fingers delved into him, it was nothing like what he had anticipated. He bit his lower lip to keep himself from protesting.

“Are you all right?”

Estonia struggled to keep his voice even. “Yes,” he said. “It’s all right. Just go ahead.” He breathed in deeply and tried to relax. It was difficult. The fingers sliding deeper only increased his discomfort, and when they parted a bit, scissoring carefully, he had to clench his teeth to prevent himself from making noise.

“Are you—“

“I’m fine.” They were moving far too slowly. Frustrated. Estonia brought his hand to his mouth, made his palm slick with licking, then snuck it downward to stroke his lover lightly, a gesture that made Finland gasp.

“What the hell, don’t, I’ll –“

“I know.” A deep breath. “Stick it in, already.” Careful though Finland’s fingers were, it hurt – but surely when they started the act, it wouldn’t be so uncomfortable, Estonia reasoned. Nobody would want to do it if it didn’t stop hurting after a while.

Finland drew in a deep breath. His fingers slid out, then were replaced, that time Estonia did make a pained sound, clinging and digging his fingernails into Finland’s shoulders.

“What’s wrong?”

“Ngh. Hurts,” Estonia mumbled unhappily. “Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”

“Well, I thought I did,” was Finland’s embarrassed reply. “Maybe we should stop.”

He considered it, then shook his head. “No,” he said. “Go on. We’ll figure it out.”

“But—“

“Go on.” He whispered it by Finland’s ear, hot breath fluttering. It had the desired effect. Finland continued, flustered, pressing deep into him. They moved together awkwardly, finding a rhythm after a time. All the while Estonia clung to him, reflecting that it seemed as though he should have been experiencing some sense of euphoria, though there was nothing of the sort. As he clenched his teeth, pressed his face into Finland’s shoulder and dug his nails into his lover’s skin, he could hear Finland’s breath quickening, acutely feel his movements gathering speed. Once or twice he heard a whisper. His name.

In that light, the pain didn’t matter so much, even though it hurt like nothing he had ever experienced and surely in the morning he would wish he had never encouraged him.

The entire ordeal was over relatively quickly, and Estonia was immensely thankful for that. He rested back and watched as his lover’s blurry form withdrew and nestled beside him, seeming as awkward as he felt.

For a time they were both quiet. Eventually Estonia murmured, “How was it?”

“Uh.” Finland seemed to consider a way of properly describing the situation, eventually settling for, “I think I liked the other things we’ve done better.”

“Me too.” Pause. “I think we were doing it wrong.”

“Mmhmm.” Finland nuzzled against his neck, then froze as he came to a realization. “You didn’t even... I mean, it didn’t do anything for you, did it?”

There was a hint of upset in Finland’s voice. Estonia sighed. “It’s all right, don’t-“ His words were cut off as Finland tugged him close and kissed him. A startled sound escaped him only to be muffled by the other nation’s mouth. Giving in, he relaxed into the kiss and slid his arms around Finland’s shoulders.



It quickly became clear that Finland intended to make up for his earlier failure. Tongue stroking, hands wandering, he quickly began to seek out all the right spots, familiar gestures working to coax Estonia into arousal once again. It took little time; Finland knew every inch of him. Soon Estonia was as flustered as he had been before the whole messy act had happened.

They broke the kiss and watched each other as they caught their breath. “I’m sorry,” Finland whispered.

“It’s all right.”

“I’ll make it up to you.”

Another light kiss, then Finland trailed downward. He could feel Estonia trembling, hear the quickening of breath, and as he took him in his slick, bruised mouth the way he gasped was reassuring. Yes, Finland thought. That’s it. That’s what I want. Let me do this for you.

He liked the familiar sensation of his lover in his mouth, the slow, careful rocking, the long fingers stroking his hair. Finland’s eyes drifted shut and he sighed as he went about his work, fingers, lips and tongue moving expertly. The sounds he coaxed from him were his guide. Soft gasps, low groans. More than anything he sought to draw out the breathless whispers.

When he heard his name ghosting his lover’s lips he knew he was near, and when the normally careful hands tugged at his hair he braced himself and received him. He drew out every part and when he was finished Finland withdrew, satisfied.

As they nestled together Finland stole a kiss, tender against the other’s mouth. Lingering, they enjoyed each other’s presence silently, as their kisses told more than words could ever speak.

Finally Estonia began, “Tha-“

He was interrupted with a kiss and when it broke Finland murmured, “None of that.”

“But-“

“I wanted to.” Another kiss. “To make up for it.”

“And also because you just wanted to. Right?”

“That too.” A pause. “We need more practice.”

“Yes. This is something that will require more research.” Estonia teased him, smiling. “But I’ll be on top next time.”

“Pff. Who says?”

“I do.” When Finland tried to protest, Estonia quickly moved and pinned him beneath him, making his words turn to startled squawks, then laughter.

“If you insist.”

“And I do!”

Content, they held each other in the dim light, and no further words were exchanged on the matter.

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